


Fading

by PandoraAbyss



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Angst, But only brief he does come back, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining Robin, canon character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-12 23:41:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11747598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandoraAbyss/pseuds/PandoraAbyss
Summary: The day of Chrom's wedding, Robin has to plaster on a smile. Because Sumia looks beautiful in her dress. Because everyone is happy. Because Chrom is happy. Who cares how he feels? Even if he has to watch the one he loves marry another, it was fine. It was for Chrom.





	Fading

The wedding was beautiful.

To the tactician, it was almost heartbreaking just _how_ beautiful it was. How the flowers were so pretty and gave a soft perfume to the room that couldn’t be replicated, how the dresses and suits shone in the morning light…

How absolutely gorgeous Sumia looked in her dress.

Robin wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He wanted anything but to have to witness the love of his life marry the woman he was _obviously_ in love with. He would rather stare at maps and read the many books in the royal library; hide himself away with drink and work and not have anyone see him sob because he had just been _too late_.

 _What did you even expect?_ A cruel voice, one that sounded vaguely familiar in the back of his amnesia-blocked mind whispered to him. _Did you really think that you, some amnesiac that was found on the side of the road would actually catch the eye of the prince? _

Robin told it to shut up and he opted on staring at one of the nearby flowers. It looked like one of the ones in that field that Chrom found him in.

He hated how much he wished he could destroy the vase it was held in with pure rage. He _hated_ that he couldn’t be happy for Chrom.

Maybe it would be better if he snuck away now, before Sumia went down the aisle. Maybe the night would be better without him, sulking the whole time over a man who would never love him back. A man who happened to be his _best friend_!

“Robin.”

He jumped, then immediately berated himself for being so distracted, especially when his eyes were met with blue ones. The taller man chuckled good naturedly.

“Jumpy, are you?”

He answered with a nervous laugh. “Strange, isn’t it? _You’re_ the groom yet _I’m_ more nervous than you seem to be.” _Maybe because you’re actively lusting after the man who’s your best friend, superior, and about to marry the nicest girl you’ve ever met._ The cruel voice hissed in his ear. He internally told it to fuck off.

Chrom, completely oblivious to his inner turmoil, hummed. “I suppose…ah, it all feels strange, doesn’t it?” He glanced around the room. “It feels odd, actually marrying someone. When I was younger, I hated the idea that I _had_ to marry and have children. Now I can’t imagine being happier.”

Stabbing him right in the gut or getting hit directly with a powerful _Arcfire_ would have hurt less than the guilt that grabbed Robin’s heart. Of _course,_ Chrom wanted children! Of course, he would be happy married to Sumia! He sounded so lovesick and _happy_ and here Robin was, moping because he refused to say something!

Forcing a smile and a light chuckle, he glanced away at Chrom, to the flower that looked like the ones way when they first met. “I’m happy for you Chrom. I’m sure you and Sumia will be happy together.”

He didn’t have to look at Chrom to know how he beamed at him. A gloved hand rested on his shoulder. “Thank you, my friend. You don’t know how much that means to me.” He gave him a solid pat on the shoulder before moving on.

Robin felt _terrible._

The rest of the ceremony and party directly after went by in a blur as Robin forced a smile through the festivities. He could barely swallow his food and let out hollow laughs as the others joked around.

The only one who noticed him leave early was Lissa, who he merely told that he felt tired and would be turning in to bed early for the night.

He just couldn’t stand watching the way Chrom looked at _her_ any longer.

 

Two years passed in a flash as Robin dove himself into work and reading. If anyone noticed, they didn’t say anything. Though he did silently appreciate when Frederick would leave him whatever meals he missed in his room. It was…difficult, as Chrom still insisted he stay in the castle with him and he couldn’t say no. Watching Sumia and Chrom, day to day as they doted over each other and were so in _love_ was torture.

When Lucina was born, he didn’t mind being one of their babysitters, as long as it distracted him.

He fell in love with the baby quickly and easily. It was hard to say no to that small, cheerful face, and she took to him very well. In fact, she seemed to decide he was her favorite person to carry her. Sometimes, he entertained the idea of her being _his_ daughter. She looked like Chrom so much it was hard to see any trace of Sumia in her and it became easy to imagine he was picking up his own daughter instead of Sumia’s.

Unhealthy, maybe, but she made him so _happy_ he really couldn’t resist.

 

As battles and war started once again, Robin found himself back at Chrom’s side on the battlefield. They read each other perfectly, watched each other’s backs and was, overall, one of the best teams in the army. Robin couldn’t count how many times Chrom gave him that _look_. That look that told him he’s the wind at his back and the sword at his side.

It hurt more back at camp, when he would go running back to Sumia, doting over her and asking her if she was ok after the injuries she took in battle. He slipped out of his own care and went back to _planning_ and _more planning_ and reading.

Then Marth was revealed to be Lucina.

Things were certainly _odd_ after that, seeing the physical manifestation of what the baby back at the castle would become. She was a teenager but she felt and acted older than she really was. She was strong and independent, a leader in her own right but still _learning._

Robin was so proud.

She became a part of their group quickly but also, the odd one out. She wasn’t from this time, wasn’t exactly the daughter that belonged to Chrom and Sumia. Robin could understand, having a curious mark on his hand gave him suspicious stares and his “claim” of amnesia made him untrustworthy outside their ranks. He was the one who’s been in the shepherds the shortest amount of time.

She and Robin became friends quickly.

She was the only one he told his secret to.

He wasn’t sure why. It was a slip of the tongue and a moment of pure vulnerability. At that moment, he felt like he should trust _someone_ with the secret.

“Tell him!” She had insisted. “He must feel the same! You don’t see the way he looks at you! He can’t stay in a marriage where he doesn’t truly love the person he’s with!”

Robin merely brushed it off. There was no way Chrom could ever love someone like him, when he had Sumia in his life. Besides, they had the baby Lucina now and Chrom is _the Exalt_. He had people around him who would object to him getting divorced to a beautiful Pegasus Knight only to marry an amnesiac that he met on the side of the road.

But Lucina was stubborn, trying to take matters into her _own_ hands.

She tried to push Chrom to spend more time with him, distracting Sumia from spending time with Chrom, trying to separate the married couple during group meetings; it got to the point where Chrom came up to _him_ mentioning how he was worried she didn’t like Sumia.

It was odd trying to come up with _some_ form of an excuse for the girl. At least, since they met more time travelers, her focus was directed off the love drama to trying to hold a command over the next band of teenagers.

Robin could only sigh in relief. At least that was one less thing to worry about.

 

But, of course, he quickly gained something else.

He needed to die to end Grima’s existence.

So, it seemed his whole destiny was to die. For the world. For his friends.

For Chrom.

He couldn’t bear to look his unrequited love in the face as he immediately yelled – practically _screamed_ that he couldn’t do it. That he can’t ‘throw away his life.’ But he cut through his argument. He would do it. He has to. He’s the only one who _could._

Chrom seemed distraught that night. He kept giving him obvious glances and worried looks.

He came up to him and told him he didn’t want to lose him.

Honestly, Robin had no clue what was going through his head when he heard the confession. All he could remember was tears suddenly coming to his eyes as he began _babbling_ about how _lonely_ he’s felt and how Chrom has hardly held a conversation with him since his marriage. How people give him side eyed looks and whisper “spy” and such as he passes. How he could never be useful enough as a tactician and a warrior and _why can’t you just let me be useful for once Chrom please—_

Suddenly Chrom was hugging him and he was still sobbing. Chrom was muttering things – apologies? Promises? He wasn’t sure. His heart was too loud. He muttered something, something else Robin couldn’t exactly hear and he kissed his forehead.

Robin wished he had the courage to pull him down for a proper kiss.

 

When the fight against Grima came, Robin deliberately ordered Chrom to pair up with Sumia. He knew for a fact that Chrom couldn’t leave his wife’s side to help him by giving Grima the final blow. And Chrom seemed to know that. But Robin was too busy trading blow after magical blow against the Fell Dragon to notice Chrom leaving Sumia with Lucina as he ran down the battlefield.

But he was too late either way.

Robin had already given the final blow, and Grima fell.

…he was so, so _tired._

Before he realized it, he was falling, and he was in Chrom’s arms. Blue eyes were staring down at him and something wet hit his face – was he crying?

Oh…right.

“Stop that.” Robin muttered. He could see his body disappearing slowly. Fading. Is this what death felt like? “Don’t waste your tears on me…”

“You’re an idiot, Robin.”

Robin allowed himself to chuckle. He blinked slowly, finding the weight of sleep behind his eyes more than he expected. A nap…sounded so nice right now. “Perhaps I am.” He muttered. “I let myself fall in love with you after all.” There was no reason to hide it anymore.

Chrom was silent. Shock was written all over his face. He was practically sobbing – something else in his eyes Robin couldn’t place just yet. “You…you’ve…how long?”

“Does it…matter?” The world around Chrom was starting to fade quickly. He kept his eyes firmly on Chrom’s face. He was determined to have that be the last thing he sees, even if he was sobbing. “You’ve always been…so beautiful…so amazing…so…trusting…” He let out a soft laugh. “I just know that I’ve loved you. So, so _much_.”

“Robin…please.” Chrom chocked out a sob. “You can’t die. You can’t _leave me_.”

“…I’m sorry.” He muttered, weakly raising a hand to rest on Chrom’s cheek. “One day, we’ll meet again. I promise.”

Chrom placed his gloved hand on the disappearing one. “We _will_ meet again.” He squeezed his hand. “I’ll hold you to that promise.”

For a moment, Robin was silent, before he allowed himself a small, sad smile, closing his eyes. “What a thing to say to a man you only see as a friend.”

The prince didn’t seem to know what to say, but Robin was done.

He was so tired.

“…goodbye Chrom.”

O~O~O

For a week, the whole castle mourned Robin’s death. Everyone knew of the man’s determination, his genius and his loyalty. Even though he had the habit of locking himself away for study, most everyone bonded with him in some way.

Unsurprisingly, it was the hardest on Chrom and Lucina.

It was no secret that Robin and Lucina had grown to be close friends. In fact, it was rare not to see them talking.

Chrom, however, had much to think about.

Only he had heard the confessions Robin told him before his death, and he cursed himself for being blind to it before.

Of course, it was only with his death that he realized he loves him back.

The realization came only hours after his death, when the numb feeling hadn’t left and Robin’s words were still ringing in his ears.

He watched the man disappear in his arms and he couldn’t even manage to tell him how he felt. He _died_ thinking his love was unrequited.  

Soon, he could see why it was easy for Robin to fall into the habit of locking himself away. When you’re hurting, you never wanted to see other people. You wanted to distract yourself. His mind couldn’t help but think back to all the times Robin seemed to be suffering alone.

More than once, he’s found himself falling asleep at his desk, trying to avoid looking at other people and even trying to avoid his bed. But he’s no insomniac like Robin – who he fondly remembers having to carry him back to his room whenever he fell asleep over his mountain of books.

As Chrom worked at his desk, late at night, he could already imagine Robin, the hypocrite, scolding him for staying up so late. He could imagine his soft laughter and fond smile as he tries to coax him to join him in bed—

“Chrom?”

“Robin?” He blurted out, snapping himself out of the lull of sleep he was falling into. But when he looked back, he saw his wife Sumia, giving him a look that was sad but…somehow understanding. Accepting. Guilt immediately grabbed his chest.

Here he was, fantasizing about a dead man when his wife was _right there_.

“Sumia…I’m sorr—”

She put up a hand, stopping his words. “Chrom…you’re in love with Robin, aren’t you?”

He gaped. Was he just so oblivious? First, not realizing Robin was in love with him, and not realizing _he_ was in love with Robin? “How…how did you…?”

“I think…” She took a deep breath. She wasn’t looking at him. “I think I’ve known…for a long time now. I just…I’m selfish, I guess. I was always so…jealous of the way Robin captured your attention. Like he was the only thing that mattered.” A tear fell, Chrom stood from his chair but she stopped him again with a hand.

“Sumia, I—”

“No, no, let me finish Chrom.” She sighed. “I…you…I love you. I’ve been in love with you for a long time. But what you and Robin had was…is…so _powerful_ and so…it’s not something you and I can _replicate_.” She turned to him, her smile was sad. “Besides, Robin is coming back soon, isn’t he? It would be unfair to all three of us for you to stay in this marriage when the person you _really_ love is coming back soon.”

Chrom couldn’t help the smile on his face as he hugged her. He loved Sumia, he will admit that. But it couldn’t match up to the love he felt for Robin.

“…Sumia…thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She pulled away from his hug to give him a more genuine smile. “Now, let’s get you to bed. You have a daughter to console about this.”

 

Lucina didn’t seem at all surprised about this new development (Chrom was actually fairly sure she was even a bit smug about the whole thing). She approved of their decision, in fact, telling them how Robin had apparently told her about his feelings first (Lissa seemed particularly offended about this).

Their divorce came quickly, before they could hear much disapproval, especially since Chrom was very vocal about the fact that Robin would be the one he would marry as soon as he comes back.

… _if_ he comes back.

 

Yes, Chrom had absolute faith in Robin. He had disappeared, but he would come back. He _promised_ he would come back. But as weeks turned into months, Chrom slowly began to…doubt. What if his love really was _permanently_ dead? What if he never comes back? What if, the next time they meet was in another life, where the cycle would start over again?

Chrom refused to believe it. He _refused_ but…a year passed. His doubt grew.

Then another year passed, and he had practically given up.

That is, when Sumia practically crashed into the room he was in, panting, excitement and disbelief on her face.

“Chrom… _it’s_ _Robin_.”

 

It seemed Naga had a funny way of doing things. After two years of being gone, she had gently placed Robin right back in the place they had first met.

Chrom nearly leapt off Sumia’s Pegasus as he ran towards his love. Robin was just stirring, his dark eyes opening just as Chrom found himself hovering above him. When he noticed the confusion in his eyes, panic hit his heart. What if Robin had forgotten everything again? What if he forgot everything they’ve been through—

“…Chrom?”

The Exalt nearly laughed in relief, before holding out a hand to the man (his heart melted at adorable sight of the flowers that had stuck to his hair).

“There’s better places to sleep than on the ground you know.”

He noticed a fondness on Robin’s face as he took his hand, and Chrom pulled him to his chest, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close, burying his face in his hair.

“Robin…” He held back the sob he could feel rising in his throat. “I missed you so much…”

“Chrom?” Robin’s face was red and filled with disbelief. He glanced behind him, and at that moment he remembered Sumia was probably still standing there.

He glanced back at her. She gave him a wink before turning away, tending to her Pegasus instead. “Just pretend I’m not here.”

“But…you two…” Robin sputtered, trying to pull away from Chrom, but he was stronger and he _refused_ to let his tactician go.

“…we divorced two years ago.” He told him. “After I…realized my feelings for you.”

Robin stared at him, before he bit his lip and his eyebrows furrowed. Chrom could almost hear the many jumbled thoughts running through his mind. His adorable expression was reminiscent of the same one he always had when he was forming one of his winning strategies.

“…you…? It’s been…?” He pulled away. Chrom, with disappointment, let him go. Perhaps he had…romanticized Robin’s returned more than he thought. He _died_ thinking his love was unrequited. Now he’s woken up, two years had passed and already, so much has changed.

“Robin…? Are you…ok?”

“I shouldn’t…I shouldn’t _be here,_ Chrom.” Robin began, the self-loathing in his voice made Chrom hurt for him. “I _died_ and…and I told you…”

“You love me. And that’s what it took for me to realize that I love you back.” He explained as calmly as he could.

“How do you know you don’t just feel _sorry_ for me?” He suddenly snapped. “You expect me to believe after…after _years_. After you _got married_ and you were so _happy_ and you had Lucina and you—”

Chrom grabbed Robin by his arms, forcing him to look at him, so he could _see_ the truth in his eyes. “I _didn’t_ _realize_ how much I _loved you_ until you _died in my arms_.”

 _That_ got Robin to shut his mouth, his eyes wide. Wetness poured down Chrom’s cheeks – he was crying.

“When you died, it felt like a _hole_ was _ripped from my chest_ and all I could think about was you. I couldn’t _stand_ the fact that I wouldn’t be able to see you every day. I loved you so much you popped up in my dreams all the time and I…” He choked out a sob. He pulled the shorter man back into his arms. “…don’t leave me again Robin. _Please_.”

“…Chrom I…” Robin buried himself into his chest. Chrom could feel his heart soar. “…I won’t. I promise.”

“…thank you.”

A beat passed. Chrom looked down at him.

“Robin?”

He looked up. “Yes?”

He leaned down, and brushed their lips together. He could feel Robin freeze in his arms, and for a moment he wondered if he had overstepped his boundaries. He began to pull away when Robin suddenly grabbed him and pulled him back down for another kiss, filled with passion and happiness and _love_.

When they pulled away, Robin was breathless, his cheeks red but his smile so bright and warm Chrom knew right then and there that he would destroy the world to protect that smile.

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

Chrom laughed and pulled Robin closer, hearing the man in his arms laugh as well.

“Are you two done?” Sumia called, her own smile on her face. “We have a wedding to plan, you know.”

“Who’s?” Robin blinked in surprise.

Chrom merely grinned.

O~O~O

Four years ago, if you had gone up to Robin when he was sitting in Chrom and Sumia’s wedding and told him one day _he_ would be the one marrying Chrom, he would not only not believe it, he would tell them they were stupid. After all, back then he thought there was absolutely no way Chrom would fall in love with someone like him. But now, he wasn’t just looking at beautiful flowers, cursing the fact that Sumia looked beautiful with them in her hair, he was looking at those flowers in _his_ hair, blushing as Lissa told him how wonderful he looked and “oh gods Chrom is going to _love_ it.”

Beaming, when Chrom stared at him breathlessly, full of love in his gaze as they told each other their vows. (“I’ve always told you…you’re the wind at my back and the sword at my side. And I _love you_.”)

That night, during the party, he didn’t leave early. He didn’t have a reason to. He wasn’t filled with bitterness nor did he feel so alone.

And that night, when he went to his room – _their_ room – he couldn’t stop smiling as Chrom kept _kissing_ him and muttering how much he loved him, holding him through the night. Promising not to let go.

And Robin promised back. He wouldn’t leave him.

He wouldn’t fade away.


End file.
